Busy as a Bee

I think that my depression meds are not working. All I want to do is sleep, eat and sleep more. I can't seem to get motivated to do anything. The donor and I have been fighting about housework, but I don't think that he realizes just how much it takes for me to get out of bed. I probably wouldn't if I didn't have to take care of the baby.

My friend, Jessie, is getting married today. She and her fiance', Bill, are my neighbors. It's sweet, but I just want to tell them to run. RUN FAR FAR AWAY!!!! YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THIS! YOU WILL BEGIN TO HAVE SERIOUS DOUBTS ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP. JUST STAY SHACKED UP!!!

My new blog, yes... Simon has made it a little difficult for me to express everything that I feel needs to be talked about. My new blog is vanilla, has my own name and doesn't mention anyone else by name. It's a place where I can go and talk about my personal issues without having to link them to him. I am my own person there, and I discuss what really bothers me about myself and society. Personal things that I can't discuss with Simon. Things about my insecurities and such. I'm not sure it would be interesting to anyone else, but I feel it has more of the real issues of me than this blog. I'm not trying to hold out, I just need a sanctuary.

Update on the Wet Nuts...Again

For those keeping track...

The wet nuts were found. In my husband's private room. Hidden behind some bins.

The reason I know this is because my little one wandered into the room and started pulling stuff off his shelves. When I went to return them I spotted the box, tucked into the corner of the room.

So, I ask you, what should I do? I'll tell you what I did. I brushed it off. I told him that if he wanted to keep the nuts and a relationship with her, fine. I don't care. And I don't. I have seriously become numb regarding our relationship.

Yes, I love him. Yes, I want more. How much more? I don't know. I asked him if we could see other people. He thinks it's a bad idea. Funny, I mainly asked because I figured that was what he would like. I don't care.

Class Discussion

I'm experiencing life anew. Sorta. I'm taking a class at my local community college and I like it. I am relishing in the challenges that the teacher puts forth and the exchange from the other students. But there always has to be a know it all. I was talking with a mother of twins and we got on the subject of step-children and how sometimes it can be difficult for the step-parent. We'll little miss know it all who, has taken some courses in child psychology started spewing sewage about how we probably don't understand the child and that we are just making the situation difficult for them. Ummm.... HELLO! Don't talk to me about dealing with children when you don't have any of your own. I told her that and then we proceeded to ignore her comments. Sheesh....